One boy looks into a girl’s purse in a classroom…
She says.. it’s bad manners 😡
he says.. it’s not 🙂
She asks… why?
He replies… Because.. members of the same class can access private data!!
——–
Typical – C++/Java Students 😀
Top Funny Jokes for Computer Programming
Best WhatsApp Quotes on Programming Languages
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
-Michael Sinz
Java is to JavaScript what Car is to Carpet.
-Chris Heilmann
Software and cathedrals are much the same – first we build them, then we pray.
-Sam Redwine
In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they’re not.
-Yogi Berra
God could create the world in six days because he didn’t have to make it compatible with the previous version.
-Anonymous (@jokofy in that case) 😉
Continue reading
Hindu Gods as and in IT world
Hindu Gods as and in IT world.
Brahma: System installer
Vishnu: System operator
Shiva: System programmer
Narad: Data Transmitter
Continue reading
Sumona has good knowledge of MS Office
Kapil ki le li 😀
Are you one of these?
Programmers will get this one 😀
Inception Movie Explanation by a Programmer
Q: How do you explain the Inception Movie to a programmer?
A: Basically, when you run a VM inside another VM, inside another VM, inside another VM… everything runs real slow! 😀
Functions – Programming Jokes
When do two functions fight?
“When they have arguments”
When is a function a bad investment?
“When there’s no return”
What did the suicidal function say?
“GOODBYE WORLD”
How do functions break up?
“They stop calling each other!”
What happened to the function that ran away?
“It never returned”
In what unit do you measure a function’s length?
“In Para meters…”
What did the flirtatious function say?
“Call me ;)”
What happened to all the illegal exceptions?
“They were all caught!”
What do threads do after they make love?
“They go to sleep”
Why do we rarely see a program with crooked teeth?
“Because most of them have braces”
Two types of Programmers
There are two types of People
1)
if (condition)
{
// do something
}
2)
if (condition) {
// do something
}
Programmers will get it 😉
Best Geeky Jokes for Programmers & Web Developers
Programming is like sex.
One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life!
Why did the programmer quit his job?
Because he didn’t get arrays (a raise)
Why did the modern web developer leave the restaurant?
Because of the table layout!
A SQL query walks up to two tables in a restaurant and asks:
“Mind if I join you?”
Why did the css geek add body { padding-top: 1000px; } to his face book profile?
Because he wanted to keep a low profile!
An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, tavenr, pub, Irish pub, drinks, alcohol, beer, vodka…
What is the most used language in programming?
Profanity
Definition of algorithm
algorithm (noun): Word used by programmers when they do not want to explain what they did.
Programming Jokes – Some issue with MySQL
A Programmer and A Management Guy – Must Read
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?”
The man below says: “Yes, you’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field.”
“You must work in Information Technology,” says the balloonist.
“I do” replies the man. “How did you know?”
“Well,” says the balloonist, “everything you have told me is technically correct, but it’s of no use to anyone.”
The man below replies, “You must work in management.”
“I do” replies the balloonist, “But how’d you know?”
“Well”, says the man, “you don’t know where you are, or where you’re going, you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault.”