Outside a parrot’s cage in a zoo on a board it’s written :
Parrot can speak in English, Hindi and Punjabi…
Santa decided to check this out..
He asked the parrot :”Who are you”?
Parrot : “I’m a parrot. ”
Santa (in Hindi) : “Tum kaun ho”?
Parrot : “Main ek tota hun”..
Santa (this time in Punjabi) : “Tussi kaun O”?
Parrot : “Teri Maa Da Yaar… Tenu ik vari samajh nahi Aundi… Tu khota te main tota..!!” ๐ ๐
Closing the Divorce and Alimony case of Santa Singh vs Preeto Kaur…
Judge : I have reviewed this case carefully and have decided to give your wife alimony of Rs 20,000 per month.
Santa: That’s very fair & kind of you, your honor. And whenever possible, I’ll also try to give her some money myself!!
A Gujrati, a Madrasi and a Sardaar were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.
They were having lunch and Gujju opened his lunch box & said, “Dhokla! If I get dhokla one more time for lunch, I’m going to jump off this building.”
The Madrasi opened his lunch box and exclaimed, “Idli Sambhar again! IfI get idli sambhar one more time I’m going to jump off too.”
The Sardaar opened his lunch and said, “Parontha again! If I get a parontha one more time, I’m jumping too.”
The next day, the Gujju opened his lunch box, saw dhokla, and jumped to his death.
The Madrasi opened his lunch, saw idli sambhar, and jumped, too.
The Sardaar opened his lunch, saw the parontha and jumped to his death as well.
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Teacher : Name different type of Cheese.
Banta :
1. White
2. Cottage
3. Mozarella
4. Cheddar
5. Swiss blue
6. Bekhudi
7. Zindagi
Teacher : Wait a minute, what is ‘Bekhudi’ and ‘Zindagi’?
Banta : Hosh walon ko khabar kya, ‘Bekhudi’ kya cheese hai. Ishq kijiye phir samjhiye, ‘Zindagi’ kya cheese hai…. ๐ ๐ ๐
ALSO READ: Santa in class
Santa’s e-banking password was:
“ram-sita-laxman-hanuman-ravan-delhi-kejriwal”
Banta: Yaar! Itna lamba password?
Santa: Kya karoon. Bank wale kehte hai ki password main 5 character aur 1 capital hona chahie….
Banta: wo sab thik hai, par Kejri uncle kyun ??
Santa: Ek special character bhi zaroori hai…. ๐ ๐
Santa jab bhi kapde dhota, tab hi baarish ho jaati.
Ek din dhoop nikli toh usne shukr kiya aur dukaan pe surf lene gaya.
Wo jaise hi dukaan par gaya,
baadal zor-zor se garajne lage.
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Ek Bar Ek Angrej India Ghumne Aya,
Ghumte Ghumte Punjab Ke Ek Gaanv Mein Pahuncha
Waha Use Santa Dikha To Usne Santa Se Puchha
Angrej: Kya Tumhare Gaanv Mein Koi Mahaan Aadmi Paida Hua Hai?
Santa Kuch Sochke Bola:
Nahi Ji, Idhar Sab Chote Bachhe Hi Paida Hote Hai ๐ ๐
Wife: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.
Santa Sardar: Tum bhi toh kitni moti ho gayi ho,
Wife: Main toh maa banne wali hoon!
Santa Sardar: To pagal AAurat Main bhi toh baap banne wala hoon. ๐ ๐
Santa Underwear khareedne gaya…
Dukandar ne use 300 Rs ki mast underwear dikhayi.
Price sunkar Santa bola:
“Yaar roj pehenne wala dikhao, Party wear nahin chahiye” ๐ ๐
Also Read: Santa in Ladies Toilet
Santa Ek Doctor ke pass gaya aur puchha
Doctor Sahab ghar chalkar chek-up karne ki kya Fees hai?
Doctor ne kuch socha aur bola – 300 Rupees
Santa- Ok thik hai chaliye..
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Dr: Which soap do u use?
Santa: Bajrang ka Neem wala sabun,
Dr: Which paste?
Santa: Bajrang ka Ayurvedic paste,
Dr: Shampoo?
Santa: Bajrang ka Herbal shampoo.
Dr: Hair oil? Continue reading