The chicken PJs:
Who’s the father of the chicken?
Chiken ka-bab
Who’s the mother of the chicken ?
Chicken kima
How do u tell a chicken to call u on your mobile?
Kalmi kabab
What happens when a chicken takes a bath ?
Chicken showerma
Chicken in trouble?
chicken soup
Chicken getting injection
chicken teeka
Chicken doing flattery
Butter chicken
Chicken 5yrs after retirement ;
Chicken 65
Sweater less chicken in a winter night:
Chilly chicken
Banta: Aur Bata Santa, Kya haal, Biwi ke saath kaisi nibh rahi hai?
Santa:
Bas Mast hai yaar…
Subah jo wo chahe karti hai,
Aur shaam ko jo wo chahe Main karta hoon!
Rancho: *Smiling*..
Teacher: Aap muskura kyu rahe ho?
Rancho: Bahot dino se Facebook me account banane ki ichha thi… aaj bana diya hai… bohot maza aa raha hai. ๐ ๐
Teacher: Zyaada maza lene ki zarurat nai hai…
Tell me, what is a Post?
Rancho: Anything that is posted on Facebook is a Post, Sir.
Teacher: Can you please elaborate?
Rancho: Sir, jo bhi Facebook pe log daalte hai post hai sir…
Ghumne gaye… photo daal diya! Post hai Sir.
Match dekha, score daal diya! Post hai Sir…
Sir actually hum posts se ghire hue hai sir!
Katrina ki pic se Ronaldo ki kick tak! Sab post hai sir!
Ek second me comment, ek second me like!
Comment-Like…
Comment-Like…
Teacher: Shut up! Account banake ye karoge?
Comment-Like… Comment-Like…?
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This is unbeatable…
School teacher sent home a note..:..
“Your son is an obedient & bright student, but spends too much time with girls.!!”
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Mother sent a note back:
“Please advise a solution!
Father has the same problem.”
๐ ๐
WHY DO COUPLES FIGHT!!
My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, ‘What’s on TV?’
I said, ‘Dust.’
And then the fight started….
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My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, ‘I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 100 in about 3 seconds.’
I bought her a weighing scale.
And then the fight started….
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When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive.
So, I took her to a petrol pump
And then the fight started….
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My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and my wife kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.
I asked my wife, ‘Do you know him?’
‘Yes,’ she sighed, ‘He’s my old boyfriend.
I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn’t been sober since.’
‘My Word!’ I said to my wife, ‘who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?’
And then the fight started….
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My wife is standing & looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,’I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to give me a compliment.’
I replied, ‘Your eyesight’s perfect.’
And then the fight started….
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I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go for our anniversary?”
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
“Somewhere I’ve not been in a long time.”
So I took her to the kitchen.
And then the fight started….
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Dedicated to all married couples..
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Ek Kisaan ka beta jail me tha
us budhe kisan ne apne beteko jail me khat likha –
“beta main aalu ki fasal nahi bo sakta,
Itna bada khet mujse nahi khudega kash tu meri madad kar pata.”
Bete ne wapas jawab diya –
“papa aap khet mat khodna,
mene waha hathiyar chhupa rakhe hai !!!
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kuchh bhi kaho, CID ke characters mast hote hain!
Sunny Leone’s mom: Beti glass ka doodh pee lo…
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Sunny: No mama, mujhe nahi peena.
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Maa: Beti agar doodh nahi piyogi to badi kaise
hogi?
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Sunny: maa aapko bhi toh doodh pasand nahi,phir
bhi aap badi ho gayi, Main bhi nahi piyungi to badi
ho jaungi.
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Maa: Achi bachiyan zid nahi karti, Agar meri achi
beti ho to doodh pee lo, warna main tum se naraaz
ho jaungi.
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Sunny: OK mama, aap kehti hain toh main doodh
pee leti hoon..gut….gut…gut…
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Aur is tarah Sunny ne doodh pee liya..
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Sunny Leone ka naam sunte hi message end tak
kitne gaur se padh rahe thhe !!!
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Bas karo darindo…
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Soch Badlo…
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Toh Desh Badlega..
Mujhe itna bhi mat ghuma ai zindagi,
Main Shehar ka Shayar hoon, MRF ka tyre nahin!
——– one more… —–
E khuda, Hichkiyo mein kuchh to fark dalaa hota
Ab kaise pata karun ki Kaunsi wali yaad kar rahi hai.. ๐
An irony of life:
Shaadi ke liye aaye GANJE ladko ki photo reject karne wali 90% ladkiyo ko shaadi ke 10 saal baad Ganje pati ke sath hi rehna padta hai..
Aur
Shaadi ke liye Dekhi MOTI ladkiyo ko reject karne wale 90% ladko ko 2-3 saal mein Moti biwi ke sath hi rehna padta hai!
