Ek moti aurat ne Doctor se puchha…
Aurat: Maine suna hai ki khelne se motapa kam hota hai, par mujhe to koi farq hi nahin pada!!
Doctor: Achcha!! Kaunsa khel kelti hain aap?
Aurat: Chidiya udd, Tota uddd!
๐ ๐
Latest Hindi Chutkule Jokes
Chhote Meeting with Girlfriend
Chhote: Tujhe pata hai main aaj girl friend se
milunga
Bade: Kya baat kar raha hai, teri bhi girl friend hai !
Chhote: Haan, Aur mujhe shaam ko badminton court jaana hai.
Bade: Badminton court kyun?
Chhote: Waha net hota hai na… isiliye
Bade: Abe net ka kya karega…
Chhote: Girl firend se milunga na, usne bola tha, aaj shaam ko 4 baje Net pe milte hain… hahaha
Bade: Bakwas band kar!
๐ ๐
Ladke ko hui Galatfehmi
Boy to his friend: Dekho wo ladki meri taraf dekh ke muskura rahi hai.. ๐
Friend: Yeh to kuchh nahin yaar,
jab maine pehli bar teri shakal dekhi thi to 3 din tak apni hansi nahi rok paaya tha! ๐
๐
Indian Politics Explained
Child: What is Indian Politics?
Father: I run the home so I am government,
Your Mom is Opposition,
Our Maid is Working Class,
We all look after You,
So you are People &
Your Younger Brother is Future,
This is Indian Politics.
At Night Boy Heard his Brother Crying as his Nappy was Dirty.
Boy went to Mother, She was Sleeping,
Then he went to Maid’s Room,
Where he Saw his Father Having fun With Her Maid.
He Went Back to Sleep, Next Day Boy to Father:
Now I Understand Indian Politics clearly…
Government is Fucking Working Class
Opposition is Sleeping,
People are Ignored,
Future is in Deep Shit.=))
Suicide with Make-Up
Boy: Kaha jaa rahi ho?
Girl: Aatma-Hatya karne…
Boy: To itna make-up kyun kiya hua hai?
Girl: Abe Ghonchu, Kal akhbar me photo aayegi na!!
;-} :-[D
A Couple in a Hotel
Husband: (calls up Hotel Manager from Room) Please Come Fast, I am Having an Argument with My Wife & She Says She will Jump from ur Hotel Window.
Manager: Sir, I am Sorry, But this is Your Personal Matter.
Husband: You Bastard! The Window’s not Opening. This is a Maintenance Issue!!!
;-} ๐
Santa ki Aakhiri Khwahish
Jailor: Faansi pe latakne se pahle koi aakhri
khwaish…?
Santa: Biwi se milna hai…
Jailor: Biwi se hi kyun, Mama papa se kyun nahi…?
Santa: Saale agle janam me.. Mama Papa to Janm lete hi mil jayenge, par Biwi to 25 saal baad milegi na…. ๐
Desperate Santa ๐ ๐
Two Cockroaches in Heaven
2 Cockroach marne ke baad swarg mein…
Ek ne dusre se puchha: Tujhe kisne maara?
Dusre ne jawab diya, “Arey kisi ne nahin. Ek ladki mujhe dekh kar itni jor se chillayi, ki mujhe heart attack aa gaya!!”
Old Lady with cold drink
Ek budhi aurat film dekh rahi thi, Film dekh rahi thi, Film dekhte waqt wo har 10 minute baad Cold drink ki can mein muh lagati aur fir Can wapas rakh deti.
Use aisa karta dekh paas baitha ladka pareshan ho gaya to usne wo Can uthaya aur khali kar diya aur Uss budhiya se bola..
Ladka: Aise pee jaati hai Cold Drink, Aunty ji!
Ladke ki baat sun budhiya boli…
Budhiya: Beta main to usme apna Paan thoonk rahi thi!! ๐
Meeting with Mario from the Game
Today i met mario…
( Yes, the one from that game!)
Me: Do u remember me?
Mario: No…
Me: Idiot … i have lost my whole childhood to save ur life…
๐ :-p ๐
Beta 5 ke baad kya aata hai?
Baap (to his 4 year old son): Beta, 5 ke baad kya aata hai?
Beta: 6, 7…
Baap: Bada hoshiyaar hai tu, phir uske baad?
Beta: 8, 9, 10!
Baap (excited): Uske baad?
Beta: Uske baad kya.. Ghulam, Begum aur Badshah!
๐ ๐