Husband, Missing Wife and Car

A husband went to the police station to file a “missing person” report for his missing wife:

Husband : -I lost my wife, she went shopping hasn’t come back yet.
Inspector : -What is her height?
Husband : -Average, I guess.
Inspector : -Slim or healthy?.
Husband : -Not slim, but probably healthy.
Inspector : -Color of eyes?
Husband : -Never noticed.
Inspector : -Color of hair?
Husband : -Changes according to season.
Inspector : -What was she wearing?
Husband : -Not sure, either a dress or a suit.
Inspector : -Was she driving?
Husband : -Yes.
Inspector : -Color of the car?

Husband : -Black Audi A8 with supercharged 3.0 litre V6 engine generating 333 horse power teamed with an eight-speed tiptronic automatic transmission with manual mode. And it has full LED headlights, which use light emitting diodes for all light functions and has a very thin scratch on the front left door… and then the husband started
crying…

Inspector: -Don’t worry sir,…We will find your car.

Moral – “men will be men”

Husband Wife Jokes, Jokes | English | Joker

India Pakistan World Cup Jokes

15th Feb ko hue India Pakistan Cricket Match mein 6th time (in all world cups) India ne Pak ko hara diya!

Usse pehle aur baad chal rahe whatsapp jokes ka anand lein…

——————
BEFORE THE MATCH
——————

Koi bhi jeete, main manta hoon ki dono team achchi bhawna se sirf cricket khele,
Haar-jeet to lagi rehti hai…

Aur haan…

Pakistan ki Toh Band Baja Denge !!

——–

Pakistaniyo padh lo chahe kitna bhi ‘Kalma’
Tabaahi macha ke rahega Anushka ka ‘Balma‘!

——–

Pakistani Khiladi: Bhai jaan, haar gaye to kya hoga?

Afridi: Abe yeh soch, jeet gaye to English kaun bolega?!!! ๐Ÿ˜€

——–

Isi beech, Start Sports ne ek Ad dikhaya, Ki akhir pakistan patakhe kab fodega?
Match khatam hone ke baad, Usi par ban gaye kayi jokes…

pak patakhe cricket joke meme

dhoni india pakistan patakhe meme

————-

Aur isi beech Pakistan mein
patakho ki dukaan ke bahar
board lag gaya hai…

“Becha hua maal, wapas nahin hoga!!” ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜›

Jokes, WhatsApp Jokes | Cricket, Hindi, India-Pakistan, Pakistan | Joker

Wife’s Report Card

Husband was shocked
to read wife’s
Old school report card..

The comment written on report card…

.

Very obedient and
Soft Spoken student !!!

Husband Wife Jokes, Jokes | English | Joker

A Nice Quote aur Traffic Police

“Everyone goes with the flow…but the one who goes against the flow becomes someone remarkable in life…”
-Vivekanand

.

.

Before I could explain this to the Traffic Police, paagal ne challan kaat diya….!!!

Funny Quotes, Jokes | Hinglish | Joker

Jokes on WhatsApp Group Admin

Admin par bijli ka taar gir gaya

Admin tadap-tadap ke marne hi wala tha ki
achanak…
Use yaad aaya ki bijli to 2 din se band hai..

Wapas uthkar, hanste hue bola,
Aailaa..
Yaad nahin aata to mar hi jaata!

————————————

Admin jalebi bech raha tha,
lekin bola raha tha.. “Aaloo le lo aaloo”

Santa: Yeh to jalebi hai..

Admin : Abe chup ho ja, warna makkhiya aa jayegi!

Intelligent hai na apna Admin!!

————————————

Admin ke hath mein naya phone dekhkar

Dost bola:
Naya phone kab kharida?

Admin: naya nahin hai, girfriend ka hai!

Dost: Girlfriend ka phone kyun le aaya!

Admin:
Roj kehti thi, mera phone nahin uthate, Aaj mauka mila.. Utha laaya… ๐Ÿ˜‰ ๐Ÿ˜›

Humare admin ki baat nirali

Jokes, WhatsApp Jokes | Hindi | Joker

Girls applying lipstick in School

A certain private school was faced with a unique problem, where a number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick.

They would apply it in the bathroom, which was fine. But after that they would press their lips on the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.

Every night the maintenance janitor would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back.

Finally the principal decided that something had to be done.

She called all girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance janitor. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine all the yawns from the little princesses).

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance janitor to show the girls how much effort was required.

He took out a long-handled mop, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it.
Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

Jokes | English, Girls | Joker

Sharaabi aur train

1 Sharabi train ki patri par so gaya..
1 aadmi bola train ayegi to mar jayega..

.

.

.

.

Sharabi: Saale abhi Aeroplane upar se gaya kuch nahi hua to train kya chiz hai!!

Jokes, WhatsApp Jokes | Hindi, Sharabi | Joker

Rajasthani Wife and Japanese Hubby

A Rajasthani girl marries a Japanese.
A year later they are blessed with twins.

Guess what they name the twins?

They name them,

Jo-hoyo, So-hoyo !!

Jokes | Hindi, Rajasthan | Joker

A Guy used The Ladies Toilet

A Guy in a hurry used the ladies toilet in a posh hotel.. ๐Ÿ™‚

He sat down.. and noticed four buttons –
WW, WA, PP & APR…

Curious, he pressed WW & his butt was gently sprayed with WARM WATER,
he loved it so much..!!

He then pressed WA & a blast of WARM AIR dried him up. Still loving it… ๐Ÿ™‚

He pressed PP & a POWDER PUFF to make him smell fresh.
Feeling pampered… <3

He decided to press the last button APR.
Continue reading

Jokes | English, Naughty | Joker

Teacher – Who is SRK?

Teacher – Who is SRK?

Alia Bhatt –
A guy who does ‘Titanic pose’ again and again,
without Titanic and without Kate Winslet.. ๐Ÿ˜€

Celebrity Jokes, Jokes | Alia Bhatt, English, SRK | Aditya

Bollywood Songs for School Life

school-life-bollywood-songsSCHOOL :
Apni to paatshala
masti ki pathshala

TUTION :
Idhar chala mai udhar chala

MATHS :
Ajeeb dastan hai yeh

SCIENCE :
Aa khusi se kudkushi karle

GEOGRAPHY :
Musafir hoon main yaaro

ECONOMICS :
Kyu paisa paisa karti hai,
paise pe kyu tu marti hai

EXAM :
Zehrelein raatey ninde udd jati hai

RESULT :
Jiya dhadak dhadak

PASS :
Aaj mai upar asman niche ๐Ÿ˜€

FAIL :
Jag suna suna lage.. ๐Ÿ™ ๐Ÿ˜›

Jokes, Student Teacher Jokes | Bollywood, Hindi, Jokes, School | Joker

Get New Jokes in your mailbox

Subscribe for daily email, and never miss out on most popular jokes.