Alia bhatt: Hey dad, what plans for weekend ?
Mahesh bhatt: Income Tax Returns
Alia bhatt: Hey first part kab release hua tha?
Mahesh bhatt: jaa meri ma, tu shooting pe jaa!!!
100 meter ki race ho rahi thi…
Referee said ‘1,2,3 GO!’…
Everybody started running except Alia bhatt.
Referee – y r u not running…?
Alia – My number is 4
SBI Bank: Humara bank aapko bina interest ke loan de raha hai….
Agar dene mein interest hi nahi hai to kyu de rahe ho? Nahi chahiye….
Once there was a mirror that killed anyone who lied..
FRENCH : I think I don’t smoke (died)
AMERICAN : I think I love my wife (died)
ALIA BHATT: I think.. (died)?
Alia bhatt and Varun Dhawan are walking on a road,
and they find a 1000 rupee note lying down.
Alia – what should we do now?
Varun- we’ll take 50:50.
Alia- what about the remaining 900?
Alia Bhatt: Let’s go for movie .
Varun: Shit, I’ve got a doctor’s appointment today..
Alia Bhatt: Just cancel it, Tell him you’re sick!
Alia reading newspaper..
“Indian athlete lost gold medal in long jump”
Who told him to wear gold medal while jumping!!!