Wrong English Sentences People use

Terrible English:

1) There is no wind in the football..
2) I talk, he talk, why you middle talk?.
3) You rotate the ground 4 times..
4) You go and understand the tree.
5) I’ll give you clap on ur cheeks..
6) Bring your parents and your mother and especially your father.
7) Close the window airforce is coming.
8) I have two daughters and both are girls..
9) Stand in a straight circle..
10) Don’t stand in front of my back
11) Why Haircut not cut..?
12) Don’t make noise.. principle is rotating in the corridor
13) Why are you looking at the monkey outside the window when I’m here?
14) You talking bad habit
15) Give me a red pen of any colour.
16) Can i have some snow in my cold drink?
17) Pick the paper and fall into the dustbin.
18) Both of u stand together separately.
19) Keep quiet the principal just passed away!!

Jokes | English | Joker

How Stock Market works!

It was autumn, and the Red Indians asked their New Chief if the winter was going to be cold or mild.

Since he was a Red Indian chief in a modern society, he couldn’t tell what the weather was going to be.

Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he replied to his Tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect wood to be prepared.

But also being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked ‘Is the coming winter going to be cold?’

‘It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold indeed,’ the weather man responded.

So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood. A week later, he called the National Weather Service again. ‘Is it going to be a very cold winter?’

‘Yes,’ the man at National Weather Service again replied, ‘It’s definitely going to be a very cold winter.’

The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of wood they could find.

Two weeks later, he called the National Weather Service again.

‘Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?’ ‘Absolutely,’ The man replied. ‘It’s going to be one of the coldest winters ever.’

‘How can you be so sure?’ the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, ‘The Red Indians are collecting wood like crazy.’

This is how stock markets work.

Jokes, WhatsApp Messages | English | Joker

I can do this, Can you do that?

I can put Coffee in coffee cup.
Can you put world in World Cup?

No? I Know..
OK 1 more..

I can send my Address on your Mobile.
Can you send your Mobile on my Address?

Nahi.. ??Ok OK

What about this one?

I can eat Cream Biscuits with Cream.
Can you eat Tiger Biscuit with tiger?

Kaha na.. only I m the Best… You are not!

Jokes, WhatsApp Jokes | English | Joker

Phone par mili dhamki

Customer: Mujhe phone per dhamkiya mill rahi hai…

Police: Kaun hai woh jo aapko dhamkiya de raha hai?

Customer: Telephone wale bolte hai ke, “Bill nahi bharoge toh kaat denge.”

Jokes | Hindi | Joker

Hindi Kamaal ki language hai

How Hindi helps us saving time and energy…

In English:
I’m sorry, can’t hear u properly, can you please repeat what’s the matter….?

Aur Hindi mein?

hain? (हैं?)

Read More jokes in Hindi: http://sms.hindijokes.co/

Jokes | Hindi, Hinglish | Joker

Chaube ji ko lage dast

Chaube ji ko dast lag gaye…

Wo doctor ko dikhane gaye..

Doctor ne kaha Nimbu ka istemaal karo!

2 din baad…

Doctor: Ab dast kaise hain?

Chaube ji: Nimbu hatate hi phir shuru ho jaate hain!!

Jokes, WhatsApp Jokes | Hindi | Joker

High of confidence in Gujarat

Gujarat mein daru par ban hai..

Fir bhi
Raste pe board par likha hota hai

“Don’t Drink And Drive”

😀

Jokes | Gujarat, Hindi | Joker

Pati Patni ki Ladai ka Gawah

Judge (Gawah se): Jab iss aurat ki apne pati ke sath ladai hui tab tum kaha the?

Gawah: Huzoor, main ladai ke waqt waha khada tha.

Judge: To tum gawah ki haisiyat se kuchh kehna chahte ho?

Gawah: Huzoor, main bas itna hi kehna chahunga ki Main kabhi shaadi nahin karunga!!

Husband Wife Jokes, Jokes | Hindi, Jokes | Joker

Teacher: Batao akbar kaun tha – Naughty Pappu

Teacher : pappu batao akbar kaun tha

Pappu : pata nahi sir…

Teacher : padhai ki taraf dhyan do to pata chalega

Pappu : achaa sir aap batao suresh kaun hai

Teacher : pata nahi…

Pappu : apni beti ki taraf dhyan do to pata chalega!! 😉 😛

Jokes, Student Teacher Jokes | Hindi, School | Joker

Whatsapp Status after Salman Khan got convitcted

Salman ko jail ki sajaa sunane ke baad logo ke status updates..

Aishwarya Rai: Feeling safe

Vivek Oberoi: Feeling safe

Bandra ke footpathi: Feeling safe

Jodhpur ke hiran: Feeling safe

Ranbir Kapoor: Time to get marry, Feeling safe…!

Celebrity Jokes, Jokes | English, Salman Khan | Joker

Message for God in Hot Summers

Dear Suraj Bhagwan,

Please go to Settings > Display > Brightness…
and lower your brightness…

It’s too hot to handle!!


Garmi se pareshan Aadmi

Jokes, WhatsApp Jokes | Hindi | Joker

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