Santa Banta jokes collection

Height of guessing an answer……

Teacher – who was chandra gupta morya.

Santa – he was cousin of ganpati bappa morya….!!

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Sonakshi Sinha knocks on santa’s door: Kya aapke toothpaste me namak hai??

Santa: Chal bhaag Moti, ab thodi der me poochegi kya aapke shampoo me Chaatmasala hai!!!

Sardaar dekha nahi ki shuru ho jaate hain!

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Santa to Son: “maths vich fail kyu hoya”..

Son: 1st day teacher kendi 5+3=8..
Agle din kendi 6+2=8.. fir kendi 4+4=8
ullu di pathi khud confusd hai mainu ki padaeygi..?

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Sir: Define Energy ?

Santa: Sir pura nai aata hain, thoda last ka pata hain, bas.

Sir: Thik hain, jitna aata hain utna bolo.

Santa: “and this is called Energy……”

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Salesman: Sir, cockroach k liye powder loge kya?

Santa: ” Nahi, hum cockroach ko itna laad-pyar nahi karte! Aaj powder laga denge to kal sala DEO mangega!!

Salesman Fainted !

Santa Banta | Hindi | Joker

Gaanv ke Sardar aur Helicopter

Two seater helicopter punjab ke ek gaan mein gira…
Gaanv ke saare sardar raahat karya mein lag gaye aur 600 shav nikal laaye!

Saala samjh nahi aa raha tha ki aisa kaun sa helicopter tha jisme 600 log sawaar the..

Baad mein pata chala ki Helicopter Kabristan mein gira tha!!

Bolo ta ra ra ra…! :D

Jokes | Hindi, Sardar | Joker

Funny Punjabi Kavita

Assi dhoop samjhe, Oo chaa nikli..

Assi Sherni samjhe, Oo Gaay nikli..

Beda gark ho aena beauty parlour da..

Assi kudi samjhi oo to Kudi di Maa nikli!!

:-D :-P

Funny Shayari | Punjabi | Joker

Funny Mobile Recharge Jokes

Net pack khatam ho raha hai, Koi hai recharge karwane wala?

Abhay ne mere mobile mein 100 Rs ka recharge karaya to uski 3 din baad naukri lag gayi!

Jagdish ne 150 ka karaya, Uski shaadi pakki ho gayi!

Ahmed ne 50 ka karaya, Uska khoya bakra wapas aa gaya!

Harwinder Singh ne 125 ka karaya, Use Canada jaane ka Visa mila!

Sheela ne 500 ka karaya, wo jawaan ho gayi..

Munni ne nahin karaya, Wo badnam ho gayi!

Aage aapki marzi…!

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Koi bhi 1 number mann mein rakho..

10
30
100
200
250
500

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Aur utneka recharge mere mobile par karo,
Main apko bataunga kitna balance aaya hai!!

hasoo mat, Like karo. Share karo!

WhatsApp | Hindi, Mobile, SMS | Joker

Santa ko Sanskrit Seekhni hai

Santa: Aap mujhe sanskrit seekha do,

Pandit: kyun?

Santa: Devtaao ki bhasha hai, Swarg mein jaroorat padegi

Pandit: Agar nark gaye to?

Santa: Punjabi to aati hi hai…

:-D :-P

Santa Banta | Hindi, Punjabi | Joker

Whats your age dear?

Boy-What is your age?

Girl-we girls dont revail our age to boys..!

Boy-ok whats your Email?

Girl-Pooja1988@gmail.com..!

Boys samjhai to thoko like..! Warna pogo dekho..!

WhatsApp | Boy-Girl, Hindi | Joker

Height of my singleness

A couple beside me is enjoying a lot while
having paani puri…. . . . .
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Whereas i am still thinking . . “Saale is gol
gappe
wale ne mujhe 5 khilae ya 4?”

Jokes, WhatsApp | Hindi | Joker

Latest Funny Husband Wife Jokes

Prabhu
Yeh kya Moh-Maya hai?

Apna Baccha roye, toh dil me dard hota hai.
Aur doosre ka roye, toh sir me!

Apni Biwi roye, toh sir me dard hota hai.
Aur doosre ki roye, toh dil me!

Sab prabhu ki maya hai

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A Man praying in Kumbh Mela…

Hey Prabhu, nyay karo…
Hey Prabhu, nyay karo…

Hamesha bhai-bhai bichhadte hai kumbh mein…

Kabhi pati-Patni per bhi try karo

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Wife : jaanu, kaash aap msg hote,
main aapko save karti, jab chahe padhti.

husband : kanjoos hee rahiyo,
Save hi karke rakhiyo, apni kisi saheli ko forward na kariyo ?

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Husband: Kaash main Ganpati hota. Tum roz meri pooja karti, mujhe laddu khilati, bada mazaa aata.

Wife: Haan, kaash tum Ganpati hote. roz tumko laddu khilati, har saal visarjan karti, naye Ganpati aate, bada maza aata!!

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Agar aapki wife aapka kehna nahi manti hai to..
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to..??
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Itna dhyan se mat padho,
kisi ki nahi manti…!!

Iska koi solution nahi hai.

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Wife: Janu kya main tumhare sapnon me aati hu.
Husband: Nahi.
Wife: Kyun?
Husband: Main “hanuman chalisa” padh kar sota hun!

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Unmarried boy: “Mujhe shaadi nahin karna. Mujhe sab aurato se darr lagta hai

Father: “Kar le beta, phir ek hi aurat se darr lagega baaki sab achchhi lagengi

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Assistant: “Sir, Aap Office Mein Shadi-Shuda Aadmiyon Ko Hi Kyu Rakhte Ho?”

Boss: “Kyunki Unhe Beizzati Sehne Ki Aadat Hoti Hai Aur Ghar Jane Ki Jaldi Bhi Nahi Hoti”

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Husband: tere baap ki jaley par namak chidakne ki adat gayi nahi?

Wife- kyo kya hua?

Husband- aaj fir se puch raha tha “Meri beti se shadi karke kush to ho na??

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Touching story…
A husband and wife went for a walk. While walking husband got hurt by a stone and started bleeding.
He looked at his wife, hoping she would tear her dupatta and tie it on the wound.

Wife looked in his eyes and said:
Sochna bhi mat…
Designer piece hai!!!

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Husband ko Market Jaate hue
Wife ne paise dekar kaha: Kuchh Aisi Cheez Laana jis se main SUNDAR Dikhu…

Husband khud k Liye Whisky ki 2 Bottle Le Aaya..!

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Man : Sir, my wife is missing.
Postman : Yeh post office hai, Police station nahi.
Man: Oh sorry . . . . . . . .
Sala khushi ke mare kaha jaau, samajh me nahi aa raha !!!

——- Enjoyed? SHARE NOW ———-

Husband Wife, WhatsApp | Hindi | Joker

4 Ladke Bike par Sawaar

4 ladko ko 1 bike par sawaari karte dekh Traffic police ne rok liya…

Police: Tripple sawaari jurm hai aur tum 4-4 baithe ho!!??

Yeh sunte hi chaaro peechhe dekhne lage,
Aur ek saath bole…

“Saalo, Paanchwa kaha gir gaya?? Jise party deni thi!” :-D

WhatsApp | Hindi | Joker

New Alia Bhatt Jokes – Reloaded

ALia Bhatt Jokes

Alia bhatt: Hey dad, what plans for weekend ?

Mahesh bhatt: Income Tax Returns

Alia bhatt: Hey first part kab release hua tha?

Mahesh bhatt: jaa meri ma, tu shooting pe jaa!!!

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100 meter ki race ho rahi thi…

Referee said ‘1,2,3 GO!’…

Everybody started running except Alia bhatt.

Referee – y r u not running…?

Alia – My number is 4

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Celebrity | Alia Bhatt, English | Joker
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